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There’s a similar version of this story in every family. Thousands of photos on someone’s phone. The kids at the park. The kids at the beach. Dad pulling faces. The dog being cute.
And mum? Mum’s the one taking the photo. Every time.
Rebecca came to Verve with her two kids, Noah and Leah. And she said something that resonated with our whole team: she’d spent years documenting her family’s life and somehow ended up completely absent from the record of it. Even funnier when you consider Rebecca is actually a newborn photographer by trade. She captures families for a living and still ended up missing from her own images.
You don’t notice it until one day you’re scrolling back through your camera roll and it hits you. Hundreds of photos. You’re in about four of them. Three are out of focus. One is a selfie with your eyes half-closed.
Rebecca noticed. And it bothered her more than she expected:
“Looking back, the biggest shift isn’t how my kids look, it’s how present I am in the photos now. Five years ago I was always the one behind the lens. Now I make sure I’m in the frame too, because I want my kids to have the memories with me in it, they will always have this image of us together, it will mean something to them now and even more for the years to come.”
These photos aren’t really for you. Not entirely. They’re for hanging up on your living room wall for the whole family to see. They’re for your kids. Twenty years from now, when they want to remember what your arms felt like around them. What your face did when you laughed. They can’t remember that from a photo you’re not in.
Rebecca used to think it didn’t matter. The kids are the important ones. I’ll stay out of it. I look tired. I’ll do it next year.
But here’s what she wishes every mum could hear:
“So many mums tell me ‘they don’t need to be in the photos.’ But I am able to explain to them Noah and Leah don’t see me the way I see myself, they just want me close, in the picture to cuddle, have fun and save that memory. One day these photos are all they’ll have of what my hands looked like wrapped around them, what my smile looked like, how I looked raising them. With Noah heading into high school next year, I know this particular season with him is almost gone and I don’t want Mums to miss the opportunities worried how they will look. Your kids will always look at a photograph of you with admiration.”
Not judgement, admiration. Noah’s about to start high school. The version of him that still tells his mum everything is about to shift. Rebecca could feel it. And she didn’t want to miss the window.
As a newborn photographer, Rebecca spends her days preserving other families’ earliest moments. But it’s easy to let your own slip by when you’re busy documenting everyone else’s.
“Being on the other side of the camera reminded me that Noah and Leah’s ordinary days are just as worth keeping as anyone’s milestone especially now, time is going so fast and my kids are growing into different stages in life. I want to be able to remember it all!”
The school mornings. The weekend couch cuddles. The bit where your kid leans into you without thinking about it because you’re their favourite place in the world. None of it feels like a milestone when you’re living it. But ten years from now? You’d give anything for five minutes of it.
This is the bit we don’t like to think about. The passing of time.
“I think Noah and Leah will look at these and see us exactly as we were. There are versions of my children right now that are about to disappear. I want them to be able to come back to these photos and remember what it felt like to still be held by his mother whilst he was still smaller than me and for Leah to cuddle in her mothers lap a place she no longer fits.”
The way your kid used to curl up in your lap like it was made for them. The way they’d reach for your hand crossing the road. One day, without anyone announcing it, it’s going to be the last time.
“Right now, Leah still runs to me first thing in the morning, arms out before she’s even properly awake and Noah still tells me everything about his day, his worries, his silly jokes. I know these things won’t last. Noah’s about to start high school, and something in me can feel the clock ticking on this version of him, this version of us. That’s exactly why I make sure I’m photographed with them not for the perfect smile, but so that in ten years I can look at their faces and remember exactly how it felt to be loved by them like this, right now, at this age.”
To remember the feeling. That’s what family portraits actually capture. Not a pose. A moment in time that you’ll never get back but you’ll always be able to look at and treasure. Your kids are constantly growing and changing, and Rebecca knew how precious it was to preserve these moments when they look just like this.
The family portraits people love most aren’t the perfectly posed group shots. They’re the ones where mum is in the middle of it. Laughing at something one of the kids said. Arms wrapped around someone. Being part of the mess and the joy and the realness of it.
You can’t get that standing behind the camera. You get it by being there. In the frame. Present. Not worrying about how you look but just being with your people while someone else captures what that looks like.
Not next year. Not once the outfits are sorted. Not when life calms down. Now. This version of your family. The noisy, growing-too-fast version that will look completely different by this time next year.
Your kids want you there. And one day, those portraits on your family home’s walls will be the most precious things they own.
Book your family portrait session at verveportraits.com.au or call the team on 1300 083 783.
